Humu Humu Nuku Nuku Apua'A Deluxe

Here's the new bike. A cruiser modified for mountain biking. Disc brakes, Raceface cranks, knobby tyres. No derailleurs. No shocks. As heavy as it looks. Badass. And I don't even say "badass."

We don't need no stinking inter-net.

The internet is a big ol' pot of letters and numbers and coded-up jargon that lives in the air. And now I'm on it. I'm letters and numbers floating in the air. Inhale. Exhale. I will try not to sing out of key.